• rosanna

Autumn is here, but what has changed?

Hello there. It's been a little while since I've written anything and I feel a little rusty, a little hesitant, a little timid. My blog posts started to dwindle back in July along with my hope of getting over to the US on my long anticipated flight on the 21st of that month. I became distracted by packing up my flat, checking the headlines and watching The White House press briefings, anxiously waiting for news of the travel ban. None came, and I cancelled my flight, before having to move out of my flat to make way for the tenants I had found back in May.

So there I was, living with my parents and in limbo, unable to write. I thought to myself, I must need a break. So I went on holiday to Cyprus in August and came back feeling a lot better, but still no writing. I then thought, I must need to see my boyfriend, who then flew over from California to see me at the end of the month and we had 13 precious days together after 6 months apart. Bliss, and a huge relief. But I still didn't know what on earth to write about, or what to say. I felt like I couldn't go back to posting recipes, skincare and style without some sort of explanation, yet none came. But it was during that time that I decided to pull the chord and make the bold move to definitively hand in my notice at work (they had very kindly been letting me stay on) and go to the USA at the end of October (which was 2 months away at that time). And lo and behold, as soon as I did that, my writers block broke and here I am! As it turns out, decisive action was what I needed. I had spent so long in uncertainty, and I had to choose to break it before I could move forward.

So right now, I am sitting in the living room at my parents house writing this and trying to quell my anxiety over the fact I have to find a way to fly to California next month. I might have to go via a third country or the ban might be lifted...who knows! But whilst risky, it is also quite liberating to make a decision and figure out the details later and I'm enjoying it! And as I have my creativity back I care a lot less than I would (or should?).

Watch this space :)